Oh tell me the truth about love!

[london1967]

The week-end wasn't a completely joyous affair.

On Sunday we received the visit of one of our gay neighbours/friends just before he loaded his stuff in Lynne's car and moved away.
And with that act, a long relationship (15 years) was over.

He was very stressed and said that he still loved his other half but that he had decided to move out. Oh, we are going to miss him!
In the next few days, we should see his partner too: it's going to be probably even harder for him, especially as he's on his own in what was their house.

We have also learned today that two of Adrian's oldest friends (another gay couple) have split and one of them moved out yesterday. They had been together for over 23 years. Again, the guy that left said that he still loved his partner but wanted more independence.

It's all very sad. And it's upsetting to think that you may still love someone but not being able to share your life with them.

Comments

[querrelle.livejournal.com]

Do you think 'wanting more independence' here is a euphemism for 'wanting to shag other people'? Or is it something like wanting to choose a different decor or holiday destination without having to negotiate?

With the exception of the potential complexities of negotiating sexual openness, it's hard for me to understand that some people cannot claim as much independence as they need within a pre-existing relationship.

[london1967.livejournal.com]

I don't thing it was about shagging for either of them (although in some cases it might be).

One of our friends wanted his own place, to pay his own bills, etc.

I do agree with you: when you have been in a relationship for a long time you should be able to talk about everything and find ways of realising your aspirations without having to break up.

[rexsteed.livejournal.com]

It's realizing wow, there's more to the world than just seeing things from their perspective. It's enjoying other points of view (on trips, on outings, etc). And with, it's being able to choose whose viewpoint you wish to enjoy for which outing.

In other words, you sart hearing the same opinions and those bring you down, you WILL look elsewhere for company.

[london1967.livejournal.com]

I understand what you're saying, and it's very good insight.